Dead Troll Diaries

[Tale]

Tue, 23 Feb 2010 20:05:16 GMT

He is dead.

Now what?

[Tale]

Thu, 07 Jan 2010 18:44:09 GMT

Something is wrong.

Eli doesn't sound ... like herself. She doesn't seem to remember me.

I should see her. Maybe there's something I can do.

[Kahale] The Final Letter

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 04:03:02 GMT

(( This letter was attached to a package containing the remainder of Detnarash's payment. ))

Det,

When I was alive, my name was Kahekili Niobe Akaula.

I had thick, red hair, purple skin. When I walked into Booty Bay I was all grins and so excited to start a new life as a seamstress.

Before that, I was daddy's little girl. I was Holoki Akaula's only child, I was a dancer, I could sew real good.

My happiest days were on the beaches of Stranglethorn Vale, feeling the salt wind in my hair and skipping through the surf.

That's why I wanted to die on the beach. I wanted the last thing I saw to be the water. I wanted you to be the one to do it 'cause I knew you'd do it right, you'd know what to do and you'd put me to rest the right way.

I love you, boy, and I always will. I'm sorry it had to be this way, but there was no other choice.

I'll see you again one day. Live long and live good.

- Niobe

(( Kahale is buried on the Wild Shore of Stranglethorn Vale, beneath two palm trees. Her grave looks out toward the Bloodsail ships and some small islands.

Sometimes, late at night, a red haired Troll woman can be seen gazing off into the distance or dancing through the surf. Those that see her may feel oddly at peace, though when they attempt to speak to her, she disappears, leaving only the echoing sound of her laughter behind. ))

[Kahale]

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 02:31:03 GMT

I'm not supposed to be alive.

Every time I drop off a fucking cliff or what the fuck ever I don't die. I feel my bones break but I can fucking pull myself back together no problem and fuck this.

My son is afraid of me. I threw away the only person that could ever give a fuck about me because he's alive and I'm not and anybody I ever knew either has a fucking life of their own or they're dead.

I don't want to do this anymore.

I want to die.

[Kahale]

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 13:44:07 GMT

You should be happy.

You finally got him to understand that he deserves better than a walking corpse. You finally got him to stop fawning over you despite the abuse and, let's face it, you were fucking abusing him. You ... aren't any better than the clients you had all that time ago. You're no better than the Shattertusks and the Corporal Prides and the Duskcallers of your day. Maybe you're worse 'cause you know the shit he went through. You know what it's like to lose everything even if you're the only one that died.

And you just kept pushing him.

You're lucky he didn't re-kill you.

"Lucky" isn't the right word and you know it. You would've preferred if he did kill you. But he didn't. Fucking suck it up.

Pick your fucking flowers and pretend to be happy.

Fuck that fortune teller, too.Yeah, I'm cold. If I freeze to the core like a lake in winter, what the fuck ever, it's my own fucking fault - I don't deserve anything less.

I go back to Outland tomorrow.

I hope something comes up between him and that girl, and that she convinces him that the dead are horrible and he should stay away from them.

[Kahale]

Sat, 24 Oct 2009 04:14:21 GMT

He's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's better off without you he's be

[D'arcy]

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 20:16:43 GMT

(( We take this opportunity to introduce a new-ish deadie that I haven't really done anything with in-game, but I'm trying to develop for the purposes of trying something ~*new*~. ))

Tits ~ perfect
Lips ~ touch up
Eyes ~ All glowy and shit
Teeth ~ Replace what was broke/lost, got some real shiners now all gold and silver: three up top gold, one on bottom gold, one silver bottom
Ass ~ present

I can go on and on and on and on and on ~ but nah

(( Little bats are doodled all over the bottom of the page. ))

[Zul'Tale]

Wed, 23 Sep 2009 19:54:00 GMT

Women.

I had plenty of wives when I was alive. I was never alone, never wanting, and when I died that all went away; suddenly I was often alone. When I first wandered under the banner of Curse I found myself - in my drooling, less-than-intelligent state - very interested in a pink-haired Troll girl. She won me in a bachelor auction but I never saw her again. Occasionally I wonder what happened, if she's

alive.

Then there was Maddy, who Gahiji latched onto but who flip-flopped between personality types and people more often than I did. Her attachment to Doctor Carnage also caused me issue, and the chance that I had to take her back I walked away from. I actively avoid Forsaken lands so that I do not have to worry about all of that ever again.

I don't know why I dwell on these things.

I had thought myself beyond caring anymore, but the longer I am unalive the more I realize how wrong I've been. I do feel. My emotions are stronger than they have ever been, occasionally unstable.

~~I hear Hecubah speak and~~

I am told that there is more to life than revenge and I know that to be true. The company of the unit, and of my new cat, it helps.

What I most long for is someone to share my unlife with, however long it may last. Another Troll.

Even if she were someone like me.

The temptation to raise one from among the dead of one of the Tribes is there, but I dare not. I'll settle... for spoiling the cat for now. The thought is still there.

Perhaps it would not hurt to keep it drowned. Or perhaps I may find such a woman at one of these outings?

Maybe I'll name him "Mittens".

[Zul'Tale]

Wed, 23 Sep 2009 14:52:53 GMT

Eli gave me a cat.

A cat that's completely okay with being handled by the dead.

I still don't know what to name him.

It's one of the nicest things anybody's done for me. Whenever I think there isn't anything in this life for me, this unit reminds me that I'm wrong. I never got that outta being in a unit full of the dead. I don't regret what I did, leaving Brill and the Forsaken behind - ~~I think the breakdown would have happened far more quickly if I was still there, still watching the Doctor and Maddy and the Deathstalker in that endless dance~~

I do miss Dariahn. He was a soldier, a real soldier. The others were puppets engrossed in their own monstrosity and proving one another to be the biggest monster of them all.

.... The cat is asleep in my lap as I write. I found a coupon in my stuff for the pet store here, so maybe I'll take him over later and see what they sell. Eli said I have to keep an eye on him to start - cats like to cause trouble - but I'm good at that.

~~I am the shittiest Death Knight ever.~~

[Zul'Tale]

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 13:58:12 GMT

Brewfest.

It's ...

... an excuse to socialize with my unit, I guess. I am so awkward in such situations that perhaps ... staying out of that sort of thing would be the best idea (( inkdrops ))

although it takes a lot to get me to this point, this point where I feel what the living call "drunk" -- I have rested and still feel as if the world is swaying.

I am glad I did not plan to do anything today, because I am fairly certain that I could not get up out of this bed even if I tried. So I am going to stay here.

I remember something about cats.

The others are oddly quiet, still. Are they gone, or did they even exist at all?

[Kahale]

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 13:51:48 GMT

I go away for how long and come back to find some dumbass fucking festival where it's all booze and sausage and fucking crazy winged rabbits and dwarves. What the fuck?

And Det~~narash~~ has the fucking nerve to swipe me outta there like some I'm some fucking princess

AND HIS LOAS-DAMNED WIFE IS STILL ALIVE. FUCK. IF YOU'RE GONNA KILL SOMEBODY YOU MAKE SURE THEY'RE DEAD.

Fuck.

If she lays ONE FINGER on him I'm gonna CUT IT OFF and shove it DOWN HER FUCKING THROAT.

and wear her SCALP like a HAT.

I'm not letting her or ANYBODY take him away from me.

I need a unit. I need something so I can fucking get stronger faster and oh for fuck'ssake.

I don't know her and I already hate her. If she hurts him I don't care what he did to her she's gonna pay. ~~I refuse to lose AGAIN~~

[Zul'Tale]

Sat, 19 Sep 2009 05:00:20 GMT

~~She's so pretty when she's asleep~~

Darkspear like me. Working on the rest of the Horde. Went to cook-out. It was alright.
Back to Icecrown.
Stay away from Hecubah.

[Zul'Tale]

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 14:51:05 GMT

I was in hiding for a week, at least, and Eliandra coaxed me out - or, alternately, Gahiji pushed me out so Eliandra could speak to me.

Apparently there is more to live for than revenge. Apparently I should "make friends". I am not certain what sort of living being would want a friend that is dead but it could not hurt to try, right? Some of them do speak to me - Hecubah is a very animated woman - and I have considered arranging a... fishing expedition as well. I don't know.

I can't concentrate enough to write at the moment. I do need to get back to work.

I aided miss Hecubah in Zul'Farrak the other day. For some Loas-forsaken reason, my bits still work, and I had heard that the bottles of Troll Sweat that my brethren carry is useful as a lubricant. I lied to her, said I was taking them to sell to the Goblins, and immediately upon returning to Dalaran I locked myself in my room

The ... rumours proved to be true and satisfying. It takes much longer than I would like to reach any sort of climax, however, the fact that I still can is rather

It was explained to me while I was under the Scourge's sway that death killed most of my nerves. I was raised soon enough that there wasn't quite enough time for everything to go, which is why I have any feeling at all. Signals from various body parts, skin, etcetera are delayed. Sensations of pain or pleasure do not register very quickly. I can go for days with a greivous injury and not notice until I begin to feel dizzy and get various dull aches and then I know.

Inspecting myself after (the good part about being dead is that there really is nothing to clean up) I found that my skin, in some areas, is lighter than in others. There are marks that I was not aware of before. Perhaps, when I was with the Scourge, some ... repairs were made.

I've hidden the rest of the bottles under my bed. I was shaking for at least an hour after

Get used to your hands, Zul'Tale. No woman will dare touch you.

[Story] [Zul'Tale] Breaking Point

Thu, 27 Aug 2009 16:01:05 GMT

He had been so, so close.

He had touched the heart of the Lich King, and if he had known he would have destroyed it at the cost of his life. Zul'Tale had vowed as much in his rantings and ravings, and when he was asked to join in the assault on a relic that was being carried by the Cult, he jumped on the chance to go. Perhaps this was the key, perhaps it was the heart and he'd have his chance - maybe the Lich King could be destroyed then, and he'd finally be able to rest.

It was not to be.

Though Tirion destroyed the heart and though the dread King was weakened, the party was ushered through a portal to return to the Crusader's Pinnacle. The King was starting to rise by the time anyone was able to get Zul'Tale under control - he had tried to rush the fellow before he was grabbed and hauled back by a pair of his fellow Knights, bellowing the entire time that this was their chance, they could end it all right then and there.

"NO!" Zul'Tale shouted as he was dragged backward, toward the escape portal. "No! We can end 'im now! He's weakened, what are ya doin'!? Let me go!"

One Knight of the Ebon Blade, a tall white-furred Tauren man, scowled as the Troll was dragged in his direction. Slipping his spare mace from his hip, the Knight growled, "Hold him still!" and swung. The hammer made the Troll's helmet clang from the impact, but it did its job and Zul'Tale let out a groan as he went limp.

"Bring him through," the Tauren Knight said, "we cannot afford to leave any more fodder for His use."

- - -

Jostark was a good liar. He was good at pretending to give a damn about the Horde, good at pretending to care about the fate of the unconscious Death Knight that lay at his hooves and excellent at making arrangements to get this sort of trouble out of his mane. Upon digging around in the Troll's belongings, he found that the man's hearthstone could talk, and he used it to find out exactly where to dump the man so the Blade wouldn't have to deal with him.

Or, more specifically, so Jostark wouldn't have to deal with him.

So, with Zul'Tale Scourgebane disarmed, shackled and tossed over the back of his skeletal Gryphon, Jostark made the arrangements to have the man transported to the Barrens and the Harbingers of War barracks on Fray Island.

- - -

Zul'Tale awoke to find himself on the floor of the barracks, with shackles 'round his wrists and ankles. He was clad in a robe and hood, his armour nowhere to be seen - and his sword out of sight as well. The large Mossflayer slowly peered about the room, then sunk low and fell silent as he lay in the darkness. It was night, when the living would be asleep.

He was right there. We could have ended it - it could have all been over -

" - de nightmare coulda been done," he whispered. "we coulda ended de Lich King but dey didn't 'cause dey wanted Fordring ta owe dem."

Zul'Tale let out a low growl. How dare they! Was it really down to pettiness like that? Was it really a matter of making favours and not outright destruction of the Lich King, of the man that took everything away so long ago? If that was all the fight was about, what was the point? Why fight?

"Why... why fight?"

Zul'Tale closed his eyes.

That night, the only sound on Fray Island was the deep, choking sobbing of Zul'Tale Scourgebane as the last of the fight he had finally left him.

- - -

"He's gonna give up."

"No, no. Gonn'be all good."

"You know better than that! Look at him. Ever since he pulled together and remembered who he was he's been miserable!"

"No, no. Not dat."

"What do you mean, Gahiji?"

"Women."

"It's totally not about women."

"She hurt he, and den confuse he, and he fight and he fight and he fight but he not gain not'in' and den he go lookin' and lookin' for what she was gonn' give 'im - but den he nevah find."

"So you're saying, what, that he was okay 'til he got attached to that dead girl?"

"Uh huh."

"Then everything went to fuck there and he kept reaching for more attention like that, it kept failing, and that's what pushed him?"

"Den he wanted to die 'cause he know, he no livin', no get de sym-pa-theh from dem. Nevah be trust, nevah be love, nevah be, nevah be."

"So really, he wanted back everything he had before he died, but..."

"Can't. See chance ta get out, but now..."

"He thought if the Lich King died, he could die and..."

"No hurt no more."

"I don't like that, Gahiji. I don't want us to die."

"Neither do 'Hiji, 'Tale. Neither do 'Hiji. But Zul want to die."

"Zul doesn't want anything. I mean, here we are, talking, and he's not saying anything."

"It's... over."

"Sometime, 'Hiji hate, 'Hiji hate dat some Knights be so damn whiny - den he realize why an' it upset he again. 'Tale, 'Hiji want bo-dy back."

"I don't think we ever lost it, 'Hiji."

"S-stop. Sh-shut up."

"How?"

"I don't think we were ever whole even when he thought we were. I mean, we've been able to talk all this time."

"I-I said shut up."

"Ya. So..."

"So, he thought he was fixed and he wasn't. When he was you or when he was me he was..."

"Sta-ble."

[Zul'Tale]

Thu, 27 Aug 2009 15:00:04 GMT

(( This is from Tuesday. ))

I lead a charge into the Pinnacle and emerged with my unlife intact, unfortunately, though I cannot bring myself to end it all when I have four others relying on me to keep them alive so they can return to their families.

What "profession" was that woman referring to, anyway?

(You know exactly --)

I cannot even just forget to pull the damnable cord on my parachute when the Blue dragons knock me off the Red. I fall for a while, then something primal kicks in and I pull that cord with everything I have whether I really want to or not. ~~If they forgot to give me one, one day, I would know fear and as much as I want to I don't really think~~

I'm going back to Icecrown.

[Zul'Tale]

Thu, 13 Aug 2009 14:20:49 GMT

The Saronite mines. I am never going in again. It reminds me how easily I could go back and be swayed, I do not like that reminder.

Elves.

I have had more bad run-ins with them lately than ever before. One elf had the balls to "remind" me that "the pointy end of the sword goes toward the enemy". I do not think he was expecting a retort, nor for me to react badly.

Bullshit. I am of the Horde. I'm the one with my name on the military roster.

The more I try to approach the living, to make them see that I am not a monster, to ... make friends, the more I feel as I did among the Forsaken when the Doctor sunk his claws into it all: unwelcome. Unwanted. What do I expect? I represent what they fight against, what they fear.

Why should I be welcomed?

I should not be.

I sincerely look forward to the day that the Lich King falls. My old skinning knife sings to me from where it sits in my boot, still stained by my blood from all that time ago. If I don't fall in battle with him, I will end it myself.

It would have been easier if my son had buried the spear just a little deeper.

[Zul'Tale]

Tue, 04 Aug 2009 19:55:40 GMT

I refuse to return to the Saronite mines.

Something speaks to me, directly in my mind, not unlike when I was in the service of the Scourge. I kept getting reminded of the possibility of losing myself again - I hope I die before that happens.

When the Lich King is defeated I will no longer have purpose. At that time, I will willingly finish what I started all those years ago when I ended my life in the thought that it would prevent my unlife. If I fall before then I do have a plan. I am keeping a letter on my person that reads as so:

To whomever finds this letter: If you were able to get close enough to remove this from my body, then I am most likely permanently deceased. Please burn the corpse so I do not rise to serve the Lich King.
- Zul'Tale Scourgebane of the Harbingers of War

I have reached the end of my training and will soon be expected to delve into more and more dangerous places. Will I be useful to my unit and those who may otherwise call upon me? I certainly hope so. Otherwise, why am I here?

[Zul'Tale]

Thu, 23 Jul 2009 05:18:26 GMT

We have been ordered not to work aboard the airship in Icecrown, due to an incident with an elven woman nearly losing her life within the mortuary. This is only a concern of the living, not the dead, and I will continue to seek work there if that is where my orders take me.

Thus far only Koltira has required my assistance, and I have been flitting between the Shadow Vault and the line the Crusade holds ever since the meeting.

There is a... cook-out on Friday evening. I may go, but I do not have anything to wear that is not armour. I will talk to Jeria about ordering some clothing.

Sometimes I dream.

Sometimes, I dream that I had children - young, happy children - and that I killed them. Sometimes I dream of the mates that I had, and that I killed them, too. Part of me knows that this happened, that I single handedly wiped out my own family, but it is a distant memory and one that is difficult to place. It is not something I want to remember.

Sometimes... I remember what it feels like to have my children crawling all over me, as they are supposed to.

And sometimes, I wish I were dead like them.

[Zul'Tale]

Wed, 15 Jul 2009 20:15:53 GMT

Some are so easy to rub the wrong way.

Maddy is in Shattrath. I have no intention of going to see her.

I know that, if I go, I will feel compelled to protect her and to become far, far closer to her than I should be. If this happens it is inevitable that I will be required to deal with this "Ragdoll" and, by proxy, the "Doctor". Both are potential ... triggers.

Both make me want to separate their heads from their bodies, however, I cannot do that - so I will avoid the trouble all the same.

What I am is neither good nor natural: I was dead, I rose as Scourge, I freed myself, I fell again and became a weapon of the worst evil that this world has to offer, I freed myself again and now, here I am. I am an unliving weapon.

And when the Scourge falls I will no longer have a purpose. Perhaps then I will be able to rest.

I think I am going to show that Shaman the finer art of the destruction of humans, part two, to get all of this off my mind. I need distractions. Watching the fellow squirm does count, I think.

The Gorlocs think I'm good.

I will never understand Jeria's unwavering generosity and kindness in this area.

[Zul'Tale]

Fri, 03 Jul 2009 18:25:25 GMT

Zul'Drak appears to be a hopeless battleground. The Zandalari put me to work rescuing artifacts and Har'koa had me doing what I could to help the Gods here, the Gods that the Drakkari are foolishly slaughtering, and I fear that the only light is that She still lives.

I saved Her life, and She saved mine.

I underestimated the strength of a prophet of Akali and charged in alone; the battle turned out to be hopeless until She charged in and helped me finish him off. I escaped with my Unlife.

~~Where others view me with disgust, Har'koa sees me as a savior. She sees what exists --~~

(( The last line was scratched out. He gets back to business immediately after. ))

Halfway through the Harbingers' meeting I was starting to feel off. Upon leaving, I knew something was not right but was not fully aware of what was wrong. I began to feel dizzy as I left; Miss Jeria volunteered to accompany me to Sen'jin village so I could seek information on obtaining a raptor despite my requesting otherwise.

It is probably a good thing.

She found that I had broken ribs and managed to heal my wounds.

When I am injured I scarcely notice until hours or days later; it takes the pain a long time to register due to my condition. This may rob me of my Unlife, one day...

I also found Maddy ... a few days ago. She, too, was more than one person in one body, but she split into two. If my ... other selves left me I ... it would not be good.

I took her from Zul'Drak to Conquest Hold to Dalaran.

I have been struggling with my emotions ever since.

I cannot afford to become entangled in her affairs. I have my own stability to worry about - I cannot keep us both sane.

[Zul'Tale] To Feel

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 03:00:17 GMT

(( Written slowly and deliberately. ))

I. Was. Wrong.

I saw her in Brill. (Maddy.) She was not as I remembered. How long has it been? How long since I saw her at the Faire?

She was so kind, so sweet, last I - is this my fault? Did I do this?

(Cannot control all.)
(Oh for fuck's sake, you're a death knight! You don't - )

What I would not give to be as I was before, when I was a simple, drooling fool with little to care for aside from (( scribbles ))

I have not felt this feeling in my chest in a very long time, I know that much.

I will never return to Brill again, nor will I lay eyes upon her. With her newfound insanity she is perfect for the Doctor.

I will deal with this as I deal with everything else.

... All I need is my work.

(Going to lose it again
don't do this to us)

(( On the next page: ))

Trollbane. The vial is small and fits in my armour. I will hold onto it in case I lose myself again.

[Kahale]

Sat, 06 Jun 2009 18:36:56 GMT

I hate what I am.

[Zul'Tale] Zul'Drak, the final frontier (Sorta)

Wed, 27 May 2009 20:23:59 GMT

I have been assigned to Zul'Drak (( underlined multiple times )) -- the Argent Crusade and the Ebon Blade are seeking my assistance. I, the Orc and Tauren shaman, a Forsaken priestess and a Troll magess entered Gundrak as part of the clean-up there. It seems that the Drakkari have had a rather difficult time with the Scourge as well.

I have heard that they are killing their gods. What fools!

There are individuals that I seem to repeatedly run into on my errands - the Orc shamaness and Tauren shaman, for example, or the Tauren Knight - but it never occurs to me to seek their names. Like all others, they are simply faces; applying names to faces has the potential to result in attachment which, considering the way of the world now, is simply a foolish mistake to make.

I much prefer being the nameless soldier, the man that stands between the foes of the Horde and its defenders.

((Inkdrops.))

It is time to return to my patrol. I am being sent to the western front, where I understand things are rather messy.

[Zul'Tale]

Thu, 21 May 2009 17:11:22 GMT

Perhaps it was overkill.

I provided Augur Tyren with the tokens he requested from Stratholme and have since turned them in with the Argent Dawn/Crusade in the Plaguelands. They seemed quite pleased and have encouraged me to continue clearing the Scourge from the City as often as I am able.

I am now wearing the tabard of the Harbingers of War. Though this unit is not very welcoming to one of my ... (( Inkdrops. )) I am certain that I will soon prove my capability and usefulness in the fight against the Scourge.

[Kahale]

Tue, 12 May 2009 20:10:54 GMT

Love-blossom!?

Oh you fucking tit.